Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Things That Might Make You Give Up On Your Resolutions

  • Stock market plunges; MSNBC blames your resolutions specifically

  • BFF texts you and says your resolutions are “dorky

     
  • Turns out most of your resolutions defy laws of physics

     
  • Spill coffee all over your list; what's that say... Quit drumking coffurk... What the hell does that mean?

     
  • Conspiracy at highest levels of government
  • Didn't want to break your perfect record of resolution failure

     
  • Confusion about whether or not this is a Leap Year

     
  • Shouldn't have written resolutions on sand with a stick at the beach

     
  • Realize that letters of resolution can be rearranged to spell loonies rut

  • Resolution #1: give up on all other resolutions (hey, at least you achieved success with one resolution)

     
  • You're not feeling very resolutiony




15 comments:

  1. Haha!! That list cracked me up! This year, nothing will make me give up on my resolutions!!

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  2. Good Morning, Jack! A most excellent start to the day!

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  3. Pffft, so maybe I think I CAN defy laws of physics...what?

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  4. Dude, where do you come up with this stuff? Hilarious. I'd love to come to TN and have a beer with you and Anita.

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  5. LOONIES RUT! I have to make a shirt that says that, now. Thanks a lot.

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  6. I like resolution #1. ;) Guaranteed success!! Should help with confidence issues...

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  7. Love it! Now... where's my list? Lost already? Why oh why didn't I file it?!?! Vee at http://veegettinghealthy.blogspot.com

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  8. still making me smile in the new year Jack, that will never change

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  9. Hilarious! I cannot believe I kept my resolution last year! But glad I did! 120 pounds GONE! And stay away! lol

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  10. Too frickin funny. Thanks for the laugh. Gracie

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  11. You are so funny! Thanks for a great read!

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  12. I'm gutting myself laughing. Love the words "not feeling very resolutiony"!
    Have a good one Jack!!

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  13. Spill coffee all over your list; what's that say... “Quit drumking coffurk”... What the hell does that mean?


    man, this one did make me laugh...I think I would have spilled that one accidentally on purpose...lololol.

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  14. Great list. Made me spit my coffurk!

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  15. As always - LOL!!!

    I'm not doing resolutions this year really. I want to do anything to avoid feeling like a failure this year!

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